Cockneys vs Zombies.

Oh man, surprise of 2012 right here.


Cockneys vs Zombies circulated festivals receiving praise from all the critics it was bumping into on the way, making the English proud. When you hear a name like 'Cockneys vs Zombies' you have a pretty clear image of how you expect this to turn out, don't you? After years of mockbusters by the Asylum and classics like Sharktopus or Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus we've almost come to expect that none of these films will ever be any good. I mean sure they are always entertaining but they are normally pretty rubbish. Cockneys vs Zombies seems to have set out to try and refresh that opinion, to try and revive the hope that some of these films could actually turn out to be any good. I mean don't get me wrong, this is no Shaun of The Dead or Dog Soldiers but it's definitely better than Zombieland.

It's set in East London, two workers stumble across a tomb looking for riches and instead find zombies. Meanwhile two brothers are gathering up a team to rob a bank and save their Granddad's retirement home from being knocked down. And just when it seems it's all going to go wrong, things get even worse, a zombie outbreak happens all around them. So the gang now have to go and save their Granddad not from being moved, but from zombies.

This is an absolutely hilarious film, it isn't without its dark moments, but they are few and far between. This is a film all about having fun. It's chock-full of quick fire cutaway gags that makes for an utterly surreal experience, even for a zombie flick. That being said the humour is often pretty crude, which I know isn't for everyone, everyone else though, this has to be one of the funniest films released in 2012.

The special effects are a mixed bag. Budget limitations are sometimes very obvious and there is some dodgy CGI in places but whenever they splash a bit of cash on some practical effects, the film really shines. I mean hell, this film had over eight hundred extras for zombies. It's insanely gory too, really giving it that classic horror comedy vibe, so I really dug it.

Honestly Cockneys vs Zombies feels less of your typical zombie film and more like a classic 80s action film. Often zombie films try to keep the violence down to make each confrontation seem more important and intense. They don't have weapons spare, the odds are always stacked against them and the ammo is always short, making every gun seem like a holy item. Cockneys vs Zombies does none of that and it is glorious. They've got weapons and ammo to spare, with enough firepower to make any odds feel in their favour, no matter how outnumbered they are. This leads to some absolutely insane fight scenes with a film brimming with awesome. There are epic action scenes, badass showdowns, moments that will warm your heart and leave you feeling triumphant and moments that will have your knuckles white and on the edge of your chair. Honestly I could probably recommend this to most action junkies as much as I could any horror or comedy fans.

Honestly the film is surprisingly well put together in general with some great production values in all areas, whether it be sets, cinematography or editing. I also really liked that this is set in a world where zombies are a thing, so they are almost matter-of-factly about it all. It never works quite as well when the film tries to pretend that no one has heard of whatever creature the villain is, even though everyone in the audience knows them as common knowledge.

It's really well paced too, which I put down to some great writing. The East London of Cockneys vs Zombies is surprisingly well realised, with the continuity extremely detailed. Every scene, every moment, every seemingly throwaway line has a purpose, nothing is out of place, nothing could be cut out and so the film flies by.

One of the weakest aspects of the film is the acting. The cast is great, the characters are colourful and they all nail the comedy but despite this being an English film, it's surprising just how forced all the accents and slang sounds. I think I've seen American's imitating cockneys with more success than the actors do in this film, I mean I know it's a cocksploitation film but it wears thin pretty quickly. Honestly in places Cockneys vs Zombies is so rammed with English stereotyping it's hard to believe it wasn't made by Americans.

So do I recommend it? Cockneys vs Zombies is a great film, it's a heartwarming and badass tale of zombie slaying awesomeness. Everyone puts in way more effort than the title deserves, creating a remarkably well made zombie film. If you're a zombie fan, action junkie or don't mind a bit of crude humour, then this is a must watch. Just wow.

Think About It!

-Locke, the world's worst film snob.