Thursday, 16 December 2010

My University Experience (So Far).

A person living in the same Halls as me left a paragraph long wall post on a Facebook group briefly outlining his experience, it was sarcastic, witty and amusing and summed up just how shit University has been so far.

I decided then that I wanted to expand upon that with my own experiences, in a much longer blog post.



Even before they filled the cost of university with cream to the point where it was so huge it makes your eyes water in the same way a black cock would Uni was fucking expensive, especially when you see what exactly you get at Halls and in your Lectures. My room is the big room of the floor, so my room is an exception.

The average room here is basically a rectangle version of a box room. We get a bed like those ones you expect Milhouse's Dad to be sleeping on and the thought of the history of the mattress makes me want to be sick. All the sick, piss, shit, semen, periods, sweat and discharge those mattresses must have seen over the years, yum. And yes, this could be said for all shared mattresses and I'd say 'touche' but the key difference is these are students, first years too. They've just escaped their parents they'll be drinking to much and screwing anything that moves. Our rooms are slightly more expensive because we get a sink in it, yeah a sink and a mirror, fuck yeah! We get one wardrobe with a shelf at the top and bottom. One desk. Crappy windows and some ugly decor. Although it's your room, you can't fix anything to the walls other than with anything other than blu-tack, you're not allowed to smoke in your room. Plus the staff have keys to all the rooms and have no rules as to when they can let themselves in, so for all you know they could be going into your room when you are out and rummaging through your underwear, claiming they went in for a maintenance check. We also have this great security guard, who seems to only be here to rain on peoples parades. Around two o'clock every morning he goes from block to block with his trusty flashlight and pimp coat and tells everyone that it is late enough, the music needs to go off and everyone needs to go bed. Last time I checked, I'm an adult and this is my home, I'm not 12 and living under someone else's roof. I thought the thing about your own place was independence.

My halls also happens to be over two miles away from the campus, which is totally retarded. I don't actually mind walking, I love it. But when you have a shit lecture at nine, the walk suddenly becomes a reason not to go....

Then is the actual lectures themselves. You get two options, you can furiously write down whatever the lecturer is saying and probably not listen or take in anything. Or you could take no notes at all and actually listen, but then have no notes at all. Lectures are useless, you learn nothing in them. And if you think on average, it probably costs you over £60 (with the cost of our tuition, for you guys it'll probably be in the hundreds) per lecture, so if all we do is watch a film (since I'm doing a film course), I can't really moan about the price of cinema anymore can I? Especially if I've already seen the film. Lecturers don't even give a crap anyway, they go on and on about attendance, then all you have to do is an online sick form and verify when you're back and you can take as much time off as you want. I mean you don't actually need to learn anything, they don't care about anything other than your money, so as long as you show you have done reading and do a good bibliography in all your essays they'll give you an A by default, I don't think they ever actually read your own ideas between the quotes, I don't think they care.

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