Black Belt Jones.

I spend a lot of time talking on this blog about how much I love schlock cinema and although I have done a few posts on some classic grindhouse and exploitation movies, considering this blog has around 150 reviews on it, I've clearly not done enough in the grand scheme of things, so I thought I'd correct that by doing the movie that came number thirty on the documentary 'The 50 Worst Movies Ever Made'. A documentary that has ironically a lower score than this movie on IMDb... enjoy!

Now I don't really know enough about the kung-fu cinema movement in the 1970's or about black culture to really talk in detail about their correlation but there is a lot of evidence to point that martial arts movies around now, wouldn't be here if it wasn't for the push that the black community gave to the movement. Most blaxploitation cinemas played blaxploitation movies back to back with martial arts movies. And if black culture is forever intertwined with martial arts well...look no further than Black Belt Jones, on paper a wet dream for black cinemagoes of the 1970's...apparently.

Black Belt Jones is an extremely cool and stylish movie, coming with all your typical blaxploitation tropes. A kick ass theme, some awesome fucking wardrobes and slang I barely understand. If nothing else BBJ can be enjoyed simply for being so fucking cool. Although I'm not entirely sure katas and funerals mix all that well if you're trying to create a sombre atmosphere. It is also to funny note how a movie about a black martial artist facing the mafia can be both offensive to black people, Italian people and martial artists...

The acting is in this movie is insanely bad, I mean even for exploitation standards, the actors apparently all thought they were in a pantomime. It isn't helped that the script and dialogue are just awful and it had three God damn writers on it!

The film has basically two central plots, one a device to make the other work but no device to make the device work so there is basically one central thread with loads of narrative awkwardly dangling around it. There are mafia, murders, police, set ups, revenge and awkwardly shoehorned in comedy and romance. The cops want to send in Black Belt Jones on what is basically a suicide mission into a mafia fortress because some cops got killed or something and only he can save the day but he refuses until it has direct input into the main plot. The mafia then want some land because...land I guess but a karate school 'owned by a black' is in their way. This leads to some plots about drugs and black communities and stuff, it's all quite interesting just not really very well explored. Then the owner of the karate school dies because...he does. At least, I think that is what happens I was watching this on an old VHS tape I found and I suppose it's possible this isn't the original cut of the movie because my God, the editing was so bad, the pacing so fucked the film was flying from scene to scene and I could barely follow how one scene connected to another.

And Black Belt Jones is his name - I looked around and apparently the character Jim Kelly is playing here (Belt) is exactly the same character he played in Enter the Dragon for all of fifteen seconds and this films sequel 'The Tattoo Connection' or 'Black Belt Jones 2' and Kelly also played a character exactly like Belt in a movie named 'Black Samurai'. Although none of this really explains why Belt is basically a superhero in the movies universe and they never make any attempt to actually explain it to us, the audience, the people who matter either. He even gets a sidekick eventually! And he has super powers, he does this like slow motion superkick and sends someone flying across the room.

I tell you something though, the martial arts in this movie just awesome. All the fights look absolutely awesome. I love how Black Belt Jones is basically a black Bruce Lee with way more funk. Although he sounds like Bruce Lee mixed with Zoidberg and a pigeon and it was really distracting during fight scenes. OIIIIIWOOOO! WOIIIIII! I mean sure, a lot of it is really silly but Jones just moves with such speed and the contact looks so real, he is a joy to watch. And Jones isn't afraid of using a gun if martial arts doesn't go all the way. Plus just the whole way the fights are done, it's just so cool. And really imaginative in places too, the three second darkness assault or the fact that their stealth assault on the mafia fortress centres around trampolines.... All leading to a slow motion final battle surrounded by soap bubbles.

I really liked the character of Sydney, who is years ahead of her time. Not only is she female and black, she is strong and independent and can do as much crazy martial arts badassery as Jones can. She is just awesome. And with the strong female sidekick and our hero spending most of the movie with his shirt off it makes me wonder if this was aimed at women as much as it was guys. I mean hell, when Belt storms the mafia fortress he has more women in his little ninja squad than men.

What is strange is how anime or videogame like the film slowly becomes, around half an hour in the 'Bogart's' are introduced 'real treacherous niggas' and despite looking like everyone else in the film they clearly have a much higher 'power level' since they toss the guys around who defeated the goons earlier in the movie like ragdolls.

So do I recommend this? The biggest issue surrounding Black Belt Jones and exploitation cinema in general is expectations and excuses, if you came to Black Belt Jones or any exploitation movie looking for the next Shakespeare then you're an idiot, exploitation, blaxploitation and every offshoot and in between that I know of, have never been very well written or put together. 'Trashy' they are described as, excuses for violence, sex and drugs but then why does that make it okay in the public conciousness to always have such awful narratives? Why does that make it okay that these are always badly written and put together just because of their genre? Well simply put...it doesn't but that doesn't make BBJ's a flatout non recommendation either because a film has one purpose outside of construction and narrative and anything else and that is to entertain first and foremost and does BBJ exceed in that notion? It excels in it. The film bleeds style and the action scenes are just awesome. No, you won't find the next Shakespeare here, you aren't looking in the right place even if that is wrong in itself but you could do worse than Black Belt Jones if you are looking to kill an hour and twenty minutes with something enjoyable.

Think About It!

-Locke